My grandmother, who is almost 80 now, has some seriously peculiar stories to tell about her relationship with my grandfather. I say peculiar, because it is hard to fathom how writing letters to each other was the only saving grace of their love story back then.
My mother’s courtship period stories sound a tad bit more believable in comparison, considering that my dad was allowed to call on her landline once a day so they could talk for an hour.
My best friend, who is 23, has a completely different story to tell. Being in a relationship with a guy, whom she cannot meet as often as she likes to, her romance works on calling, Skyping, texting, and well-sexting.
Now I am too old-school to get my head around this concept of exchanging nude photographs and “sexy” messages with your partner, but I’ve heard a lot of people talk about it–mostly because they are confused about whether or not it is the “right” thing to do.
If this debate has been doing rounds in your head too, consider this:
There is NO Wrong or Right in Love
Just do what ‘feels’ right. I’d say, go with your gut here. You know your partner, you know what kind of a person he is, you know whether you can trust him with something as personal as–your sexually explicit pictures.
Take your own sweet time to be sure of it though. Don’t rush into things ‘in the heat of the moment’ because…
Sharing is Not Always Caring
Not to sound stereotypical here, but initiating sexting usually is a guy thing. However, emotionally blackmailing you to reciprocate is an asshole thing, to be honest. If he loves you, he won’t pressurize you into doing something that’s beyond your comfort. If he does, he’s just being a selfish douchebag.
So if you are doing it just to make HIM happy, then maybe instead of nervously contemplating the right angle of your selfie, think about dumping his selfish ass on a pretty darn serious note.
A relationship is a two-way street, remember? You BOTH do things to make EACH OTHER happy.Even if it GENUINELY Feels Right, Be Cautious No one is questioning your partner’s love for you here. But I’ve seen the most committed men, turning into vicious monsters post a bitter break up.
Every human being, irrespective of their gender, is at their sweetest-best when in love; but things change, and you never know what extent people may stoop to.
After all, those cases of circulating nude pictures of an ex or leaking them online or simply blackmailing to do so; that we keep hearing of so often–do happen. And they can happen to anyone.
Having said that, it doesn’t mean that you start doubting your partner unnecessarily now.
However, your own safety comes before any relationship.
So If You’re Ready to Take The Plunge, Keep This in Mind:
Firstly, use the right mobile application for sexting. There is a reason why apps like Snapchat emphasise on ‘living in the moment’ and have no option of saving any snaps, unlike those typical messengers that save them.
Secondly, avoid showing your face or any other identifiable features, because you know what? No matter which app you use, taking screenshots is still a thing.Lastly, check and double-check the recipient of those pictures. I understand that our wisdom gets clouded in ‘those’ moment but you really don’t want the wrong people to see those personal pictures, right? So be careful while marking the recipients and save yourself the embarrassment.
In the matters of the heart, sometimes, you’ve got to use your grey matter too. Because–better safe than sorry.